Jon's Jottings

2012 – Week 4

Occam — Sat, 28 Jan 2012 09:59:59 +0000

Like a romantic movie, the devoted wife dies, only three weeks after her husband, of a broken heart.

After 62 years of marriage Elsie simply didn’t want to live any more once her husband had gone. Despite her dementia, at a subconscious level, she knew Don wasn’t with her any more, so she stopped fighting. She stopped eating, her heart slowed down, and she passed slowly and peacefully away.

So my wife has lost both parents within a month.

At a lighter moment we joked about a “buy-one-get-one-free” deal from the funeral home, and, amazingly, they did offer a substantial discount!

They both died on a Wednesday morning, both funerals on a Friday.

At least now we have fewer worries and commitments.

Life goes on.

2012 – Week 3

Occam — Sat, 21 Jan 2012 12:48:50 +0000

At last a bit of normality has returned to life!

Back at work for a full week for the first time in ages.
Both boys back to university.
Harry studying for GCSE modules.

The only strange thing is that we can’s use our car this weekend. The MOT ran out before a slot was available for the service / MOT test. So the car is not insured and can’t be used. At least we will get fitter walking everywhere.

I finally got round to starting my fitness regime. I went to the gym 4 times in the week and have managed to severely reduce the bad carbs in my diet. The result is a small but noticeable reduction in my weight from 94kg to 93kg. I know I need to set myself a target weight and most people set a round number….I think 90kg is too easy but 85kg would be very tough and probably not realistic. I think I will settle for an interim target of 88kg and see how it feels. That would be a reduction of 6kg. That is 14lb (or 1 stone) so not insignificant. My aim is to get their by 31 March.

2012 – Week 2

Occam — Sat, 14 Jan 2012 09:50:10 +0000

An emotional week culminating in the funeral yesterday of my father in law, Don. Its a shame that family gatherings need a sad reason to happen sometimes. It was a nice, low-key funeral with probably 30 people there. As we remarked, his generation (the world-war II generation) are largely dead or infirm. As Don was one of the last there were few people from that generation. Martin give a great eulogy that put his life into prespective. From being born as the runt of the litter, being left as a teenager to look after his little sister as his parents sailed off to official jobs in St Helena, the wish to be a fighter pilot thwarted by his hearing disability, the adventure of being the only Europeans in West African diamond mining towns, his “hands-off” approach to bringing up his 3 children in Kenya. It wasn’t sentimental, just a reminder of what he achieved and the context of the world at the time of his life.

Logistics (i.e. getting the right people in the right place at the right time) are playing a central part of my life at the moment. Simon went back to Oxford University on the train on Thursday to take exams (thereby missing the funeral) without any of his “stuff”. The same day Matt came back from Warwick University on the train for the funeral. Tomorrow I will drive Simon’s “stuff” and Matt back to Oxford and Matt will do the last part of the journey by train. I will also take Martin back to the airport for his flight back to South Dakota…..

2012 – Week 1

Occam — Sun, 08 Jan 2012 17:22:38 +0000

Well this year has already been eventful. Unfortunately my father in law died on the 4th January. He was very weak and it was no surprise when he died but, despite this, very sad none the less. I was at work but the boys, home from university rallied round Sarah and helped her get through a tough few days.

Graham has been down to help with paperwork and funeral arrangements, and Martin is coming over from America in time for Friday’s cremation. Unfortunately both Simon and Harry have exams that day so won’t attend. Matt will come back for it though.

We have just taken Matt back to Leamington Spa for his penultimate term at university. I think he is now ready to leave, say goodbye to exams, and join the exciting world of making a living for yourself. He seems to be the driving force in his group project work which bodes well for future success.

Simon is still at home, until Thursday. He will then return to Oxford with a rucksack, and we will drive up with the rest of his stuff next Sunday.

I have decided at almost 15st I am about 1St overweight. I have set myself the target of getting to 14st by the end of March. This less than a pound a week so is easily doable. All I have to do is minimise carbs….I don’t want it to be another January fad diet. This really needs to be a sustained change in lifestyle / eating habits.

Sad news

Occam — Thu, 05 Jan 2012 07:54:40 +0000

My father in law, Don, died yesterday at the age of 89. A good innings by anyone’s standards.

He hated the lack of physical mobility and strength that he experienced in the last few months of life so the shortness of this last period of his life was a good thing.

New Year’s Goals

Occam — Wed, 28 Dec 2011 17:37:57 +0000

It’s that time of year when one’s mind turns to the passing of anther year and lookin forward to the year to come.

Rather than make a resolution I will make some goals. This year my goals will include:-

Learn how to do flash photography
Sell a photograph – i.e earn my first money from my hobby
De-clutter my life (get rid of all the paperwork and other rubbish)
Lose some weight (I know its a boring old one but I really need to – the scales said close to 15 stone this morning)

That’s it. I think its a do-able list…..

B&B In Cranleigh

Occam — Sun, 13 Nov 2011 15:53:53 +0000

We had a night at the Richard Onslow in Cranleigh, Surrey last night. Even though it was less than an hour from our house we decided to stay overnight because the drive through dark country lanes late at night didn’t appeal. We met up with a group of 9 other friends for dinner. So what was it like…

The Richard Onslow has a prime location in the centre of the village of Cranleigh. There is some parking behind the pub but it looks like they have sold off most of the car park to a property developer so parking is restricted to overnight guests. There is no reception area as such but the staff behind the bar quickly found the manager to book us in. Everyone was extremely helpful and friendly. It has a laid-back atmosphere, with a young team at front of house.

Our room was at the front of the pub, overlooking the street. It was beautifully furnished with a comfortable bed and leather armchair. The layout was strange with a padded beam across the room’s hallway, before stairs led down into the room itself. This gave it a quirky feel but added a cosy atmosphere. The bathroom looked brand new, with a spacious shower cubicle. The bed was comfortable and the bed-linen clean and comfortable. One slight niggle was the lack of a usable wi-fi signal in our room. We could get the signal, and log on, in the bar area but not in the room.

Our meal that evening was good. I had a risotto, followed by a steak (cooked how I asked for it) with a pepper sauce, followed by a home-made Bakewell tart. The quality of all the food was high. All of our party were pleased with their food. The wine was good (Rioja – crianza rather than reserva) and the service was friendly and efficient.

We slept really well (even though some noise comes up from the pub for a while). Breakfast was also good with freshly cooked pastries, freshly squeezed orange juice, and a “full English” cooked to order.

All in all, I would thoroughly recommend staying at the Richard Onslow. The friendly staff and immaculate, newly-refurbished rooms make for an enjoyable stay.

Tricky Questions

Occam — Sun, 06 Nov 2011 22:01:11 +0000

In the Times Magazine yesterday there was an article about a set of questions that can make someone become “close to you” in under an hour. The questions were formulated by a psychologist called Art Aron. After a little searching I found them and have re-produced them below.

To me, the questions would make a great “parlour” game (perhaps at Christmas, after a few sherries, with long lost relatives??) or perhaps even forfeits in a drinking game? I can’t image a group of male friends discussing them but female close friends…probably! Some could, however, prove a little dangerous in some circumstances.

1. Given the choice of anyone in the world, whom would you want as a dinner guest?

2. Would you like to be famous? In what way?

3. Before making a telephone call, do you ever rehearse what you are going to say?Why?

4. What would constitute a “perfect” day for you?

5. When did you last sing to yourself? To someone else?

6. If you were able to live to the age of 90 and retain either the mind or body of a 30-year-old for the last 60 years of your life, which would you want?

7. Name three things you and your partner appear to have in common.

8. For what in your life do you feel most grateful?

9. If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be?

10. If you could wake up tomorrow having gained any one quality or ability, what would it be?

11. If a crystal ball could tell you the truth about yourself, your life, the future, or anything else, what would you want to know?

12. Is there something that you’ve dreamed of doing for a long time? Why haven’t you done it?

13. What is the greatest accomplishment of your life?

14. What do you value most in a friendship?

15. What is your most treasured memory?

16. What is your most terrible memory?

17. What does friendship mean to you?

18. What roles do love and affection play in your life?

19. How close and warm is your family? Do you feel your childhood was happier than most other people’s?

20. Complete this sentence: ”I wish I had someone with whom I could share…”

21. If you were going to become a close friend with your partner, please share what would be important for him or her to know.

22. Tell your partner what you like about them; be very honest this time saying things that you might not say to someone you’ve just met.

23. Share with your partner an embarrassing moment in your life.

24. When did you last cry in front of another person? By yourself?

25. Tell your partner something that you like about them already.

26. What, if anything, is too serious to be joked about?

27. Your house, containing everything you own, catches fire. After saving your loved ones and pets, you have time to safely make a final dash to save any one item.What would it be? Why?

It would be interesting to add a few more questions. It can’t be that difficult to make up some others…… Any ideas??

Looking for a new body

Occam — Sat, 05 Nov 2011 19:40:11 +0000

I am looking for a new body, a newer one than I currently have. I want to upgrade. My current body has limitations.

Of course I am talking about cameras here (my real body will have to do).

I currently use a Canon 30D. I bought it second hand from a guy at work and have used it for the past couple of years. During this time I have spent money buying high quality lenses rather than worrying about the camera body. Despite its limitations compared to newer models it lets me take decent enough photos.

But I want to take my photography up a level. I want better low light performance, with less noise. I would also like to tinker with video.

My choice is between three excellent cameras – the 60D, the 7D, and the 5D. The 60D and the 7D are, to my mind, quite similar (they both use the same sensor). The 60D is newer, the 7D is more “solid”. It is the 5D that is tempting me. It is a lot more expensive but it has a full frame sensor. It simply captures much more information, more detail, in every shot. It is used by professionals. I would feel equipped to do portraits or, heaven forbid, weddings!

Despite a natural inclinations to being tight with my money, recent visits to a care home to visit my in-laws has made me realise that the cliché “you can’t take it with you” is a truism…..you really can’t.

So I should enjoy the pleasure of a 5D now….. right??

University visits – and a look back 10 years

Occam — Sat, 29 Oct 2011 06:33:05 +0000

Its funny how life progresses and time makes its imperceptible changes on circumstances. Ten years ago, with the boys 11, 9 and 5, we moved back from 3 years living in Madrid. I wasn’t to know it,but I was entering my unhappiest period work-wise. This made me think about the implications of supporting a young family while hating your work; not being able to risk turning your back on a well paid job, even if it makes you miserable.

In the end, after a couple of years, I took the risk, left my job and went contracting. The result was more money, more freedom and, as time has passed, the family have become more independent. A weight has been lifted from my shoulders.

Fast-forward ten years and we are just about to leave for a weekend in Warwick and Oxford; visiting the two elder boys at their universities. It will be a bit of a family reunion as we will be meeting Mum and Dad (ahead of their birthdays) and my brother Martin and Julia (with their little ones).

I am just getting over a cold, and have been working intensively over the past couple of months. So this weekend is something I have looked forward to for some time. It won’t be hugely relaxing (with all that driving) but to see my sons and celebrate their successes is really the most enjoyable thing imaginable. Matt landing a job a year in advance at his first attempt is fantastic; especially in the current economic climate. Simon has become a scholar of his Oxford college (coming in top of the year in Mathematics) together with landing a potential TV appearance is brilliant. How could I be more proud of them?

Ten years ago, if I were looking forward to today, I would have been delighted by the change.